Have you ever wondered what your horse was thinking? Have you ever asked yourself ``Why doesn't he listen to me?'' or ``Why did he do that?'' Well did you ever stop to think that your horse may be asking those very same questions?
The three principles of the horse/human relationship are trust, respect, and communication. These principles have a priority in the horse's mind. If you try to get respect, or communicate with the horse before he trusts you, you will trigger the flight/fight instinct in the horse and he will run away, mentally if not physically.
The normal response to this is to restrict the horse's choices with cross ties, draw reins, martingales, etc. I prefer techniques that allow the horse to make choices, and then tell him when he makes the right one. This teaches the horse to respond to a request, rather than react to a stimulus. Most people never ask the horse what he thinks, because they're afraid he'll give the wrong answer. There's nothing wrong with the horse making a mistake (that's how he learns) as long as you tell him it was a mistake.
Trust is the first and most important priority in the horse/human relationship. Most people can gentle a horse but few earn his trust. In the horse's mind, gentleness is the horse not hurting us, trust is not hurting the horse. Therefore, trust allows the horse to step out of his comfort zone and expand his knowledge and experience.
Respect is to consider worthy of high regard and has nothing to do with fear or intimidation. Though closely intertwined, it differs from trust in that it helps define the relationship within the herd. Trust gives the horse confidence to act, respect motivates him to.
Communication, as defined by Webster, is a process by which information is exchanged through a common system of symbols, signs or behavior. The horse's language is a physical one of position and gestures, reinforced with verbal expression...just the opposite of ours. It is incumbent upon us to learn his language, and not expect him to learn ours. Many people believe the horse moves away from pressure. If that were true, try to pull one's head down that hasn't been taught to lower it, or push him off a toe when he's standing on it. The horse doesn't actually learn to move away from pressure, he learns to seek a release. This is where feel, timing, and balance become critical.
Feel allows us to recognize when the horse is responding (or thinking of responding). Timing the release tells the horse when he has responded correctly. Balance keeps us in position to feel the horse respond, and time the release.
Whether interacting with humans or horses, the principles of a relationship remain the same, all that changes are the values of the individuals and the methods of communication. Treat your horse as you would your best friend, and he'll trust you as his herd leader. For both partners in the horse/human relationship, trust gives the freedom to act, respect motivates them to act, and communication tells them how to act.
